


Mind Palace

by scrappylittlegleek



Category: Supergirl (Comics), Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F, I am Supercorp Trash, Lena Luthor Needs a Hug, Lesbian Lena Luthor, Protective Kara Danvers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-12
Updated: 2018-11-12
Packaged: 2019-08-22 18:04:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,569
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16602908
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scrappylittlegleek/pseuds/scrappylittlegleek
Summary: This fic takes place in season three. When Lena is poisoned and recovering in the DEO, she internally escapes to her mind palace. Because she compartmentalizes her emotions into 'little boxes', one may expect her palace to be a dark, cold place. But Lena finds a warm and safe place that she never wants to leave. Lots of Supercorp fluff.It's a crappy description but the fic itself isn't (too) crappy.





	Mind Palace

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! This was inspired by something I saw on Tumblr, so the original idea isn't mine, but the writing is.  
>  Comments and constructive criticism is always appreciated.

A mind palace, a kingdom of some sorts. A place of escape, a sanctuary unique to whoever it may belong to. A fantasy world filled with the deepest desires of the person holding it. But not just any desires, it was filled with what they longed for when they were all alone. The things that made them feel safe and warm when they were cold and scared. It was a place that allowed them to heal mentally while their body was recovering physically.

It was a place Kara had entered when she was so deeply injured that she needed thirty first century technology to keep her alive. 

Her mind palace at first was nearly identical to her normal life. She ‘awoke’ to what seemed to be her apartment. There were only minor changes. Objects from her childhood back on Krypton that she’d wanted to take to Earth to remind her of home. The stray cat she’d taken care of when she was thirteen. Photos of her mother and father. The things that deep down she’d yearned for, even though as years passed they’d begun to feel irrelevant to her life. When she’d told Alex about it, she wasn’t surprised. Nothing there seemed too out of the ordinary. Even the Beastie Boys poster that had appeared in the living room wasn’t odd for someone like Kara. She was a happy person, her kingdom was filled with happy things.

Lena was different. Though she was kind, she had a cold and empty exterior. Though she was compassionate, she wasn’t known for her portrayal of emotion or empathy. At first glance, she appeared standoffish or rude. In reality, she wasn’t. But when you’re a Luthor, people expect a certain type of behavior. So even though Lena was none of the things people assumed her to be, they saw her to be exactly the person they’d made up. She wasn’t given a chance to change her image, no matter how hard she tried. 

Kara learned very quickly that Lena had trained herself to not feel anything. She’d made up a system; boxes. Whenever she found herself sad, angry, upset or confused she imagined her mind was made up of thousands of tiny boxes. She took whatever she was feeling and neatly tucked it away into whichever box seemed fit. Then she took those boxes and shoved them down so far that she forgot they even existed. Sometimes the boxes came back up, begging to be opened. But Lena was careful, she knew which boxes to open and which ones to keep closed. She knew if she opened the wrong one, it would unravvel a long list of things she’d attempted to put behind her. Her mind was a dark, unforgiving place. Though it was filled with thoughts, almost none of them were happy. They were organized to perfection, clean, prim and polished, they were perfect, but they were lonely and sad. Just like Lena. 

She entered her mind palace only once. From the moment she got there, she knew none of it was real. It had all started at CatCo, one minute she was on the balcony with Kara and James taking a sip of coffee. She’d tasted bile in her throat before everything went black. The next thing she knew, Kara was flying her through the air like Supergirl. Then her eyes closed once more and everything went black again. When her eyes opened, she knew she was dreaming immediately. Only it wasn’t a dream, it all felt so real. She could touch the objects in front of her, she could physically feel, hear and smell her surroundings. Once she started trying to configure real from what she’d imagined, she began to put the pieces together. She was inside her own head, in some sort of safe haven fantasyland she’d created. After she’d figured it all out, she began to enjoy it. 

She took a moment to take in her surroundings. She knew exactly where she was, but she didn’t know why she was there. It was Kara’s apartment. When she looked down at herself, she saw she was wearing the  _ National City University _ hoodie and black sweatpants Kara had leant her, that she’d secretly stolen months ago. She wandered around the apartment, she ran her fingers over almost every flat surface in the living room and kitchen before figuring out what was going on to the best of her ability. Unlike Kara, she didn’t have the luxury of someone explaining to her what was going on. It seemed like that happened often, she was always left to pick up the pieces on her own. She sat down on the sofa in the living room, and noticed the grey blanket draped on top of it was the one she’d had in her penthouse. She wrapped it around her shoulders and pulled her knees up to her chest. 

“Kara?” She called out. 

A mind palace is supposed to be perfect. It brings what feels the most comforting, it brings what feels like home. To Lena, Kara was home. And although she knew it well, her mind was a terrifying place, even if she was in her own personal sanctuary. It would only really feel safe with Kara there. 

Without any hesitation, Kara came strolling into the living room, a huge smile appeared on her face when she saw Lena. 

“Hey, I thought we could have a movie night,” she said, and held up a DVD in each hand. Mind palace Kara seemed to be almost exactly the same as real Kara, this Kara didn’t even seem to realize that she was only a figment of Lena’s imagination. 

“So, I’ve got  _ The Sound Of Music _ and  _ The Notebook _ , I know we’ve seen  _ The Notebook _ like a million times, but my Netflix has been really glitchy lately, so we’re stuck with DVD’s,” she said and stood in front of Lena, who still looked very confused. 

She’d been able to figure out what was going on, but she was still having a hard time comprehending it all. 

“Um… we can watch  _ The Sound Of Music _ ,” she said softly. 

Kara smiled and popped the DVD into her laptop. She sat down next to Lena and put the computer on her lap. Lena noticed how close they were, Kara was practically on top of her. Real Kara had always been touchy feely, but they’d never pressed up against each other like this before. Lena held her breath. She liked the feeling but was scared that if she moved ever so slightly she would scare Kara away. It was something foreign and new, but she liked the close contact and the feeling of intimacy that came with it. 

“Lee, are you okay?” Kara asked, pausing the movie. 

Lena plastered on a smile. Even in her mind palace she was stressed. “Yeah, I’m fine. Don’t worry about me.”

Kara furrowed her eyebrows, a small crinkle appearing between her eyes. 

“Are you sure?” She asked, she was concerned. Mind palace Kara really did care. 

_ Real Kara cares too, Lena. _ She reminded herself. 

“Yeah,” she sighed. “I’m fine.”

Kara somehow managed to snuggle up even closer to Lena, which after a while, she found a sense of comfort in. She even found herself resting her tired head on Kara’s shoulder. To this, Kara wrapped her arm around Lena, and with her free hand took Lena’s hand in her own. 

They stayed like that, Kara holding Lena, until the movie ended. Lena had even fallen asleep in Kara’s arms. 

Lena had always trusted Kara more than anyone in her life. She was just scared to get too close to her or do things like hugging or cuddling because if Kara left her, it would hurt so much more knowing she had let Kara break down the walls she’d built. But mind palace Kara was different. She acted the way Lena had always secretly craved. She’d always wanted to find something closer then friendship with her, but she knew Kara would never feel the same way. 

But here, things were different. everything that happened would work out, so she allowed herself to let Kara hold her and place gentle kisses on the top of her head as she slept. After all, none of this would ever leave her mind palace. She was safe from any judgement that may come from the rest of the world while she was here. 

When Lena woke up, she found herself lying on the sofa, alone. When she reached for Kara, she wasn’t there. She should’ve known it was all to good to be true. She couldn’t help the small whipmer that escaped her lips at the realization of the fact that the only time she’d allowed herself to open up to someone she’d abandoned. She silently cursed herself for letting herself get to comfortable in her own mind. Even in a perfect fantasy world, things never seem to work out for her. 

“Lena?” She picked her head up and saw Kara standing in the kitchen holding two plates filled with potstickers and spring rolls. 

Lena sat up when she saw Kara walking towards her. 

“I ordered dinner, I realize now we probably should’ve eaten while we watched the movie, but we can watch something else if you’d like,” she said as she sat down and handed Lena a plate.

“No, can we just… can we just talk?” Lena asked.

Kara nodded and began eating. Lena sat there silently watching Kara eat. 

“What?” Kara asked, her mouth full of potstickers when she noticed the other girl staring. 

Lena sighed. “Nothing.”

But it was everything, this Kara was almost exactly the same as real Kara. If that was so, what was to tell her she couldn't have this kind of relationship, or whatever was going on here, with real Kara?  _ No.  _ She thought to herself.  _ You're with James now. You and Kara, that's never going to happen.  _

When they finished eating, Kara did the dishes then told her she was going to take a shower. 

Lena took the opportunity to walk around Kara’s apartment, or her inner thoughts, once more. She noticed that on the bookshelves, the pictures of Kara and Mon El had been replaced with pictures of Kara and herself. In some of the pictures, she was standing next to Kara surrounded by Kara’s friends. People who she’d met in the past, but knew they didn't trust her and they felt no desire to make an effort to change that. 

Here, Lena was safe. She had Kara, she had people that cared for her. She had everything she could ever want. A support system. 

The outside world was harsh and unforgiving. There she had to deal with the hatred that surrounded her, all because her last name was Luthor. Outside, she would face only God knows how many assassination attempts. She would have to see her boyfriend, James Olsen, who she knew still distrusted her and deep down hated her for being a Luthor, even though he denied it. She'd heard the way he talked about her. But she'd let it slide because maybe if she'd had a boyfriend her feelings for Kara would go away. Outside, she would live her life knowing Kara would never love her the way she loved Kara. But here, here Kara loved her. Here she cuddled with her on the couch and shared her potstickers. Here, everything was perfect. 

Kara returned to the living room after her shower, clad in a white bathrobe, her blonde hair still wet and dripping onto the floors. When Lena saw her, she folded her hands over her chest protectively, and took a step back from her. 

“I’m not going back,” she said softly. 

“You’re not going back where?” Kara asked obliviously. 

Lena shook her head. “It… it doesn’t matter, but I’m not going back,” she said. 

The crinkle between Kara’s eyes reappeared, just like it always did when she was concerned. 

“Are you okay, Lee,” Kara asked, Lena bit her lip and shook her head. 

Kara sighed and wrapped her arms around Lena, hugging her tightly. Lena buried her head in the crook of Kara’s neck, melting into her embrace, not caring that Kara’s wet hair was in her face. 

Lena could hear Kara’s voice, but it wasn’t mind palace Kara, it was real Kara.

“Why isn’t she waking up?” She asked, she seemed concerned. 

Lena lifted her head from Kara’s shoulder, she looked around the apartment, trying to find the source of the voice. But besides her and this Kara, they were alone. 

“You have to give it some time, she’s still hypothermic. You should take her back to CatCo, if she wakes up here she’ll be confused and ask questions we can’t answer,” the voice belonged to Alex. 

“Lena, you’re shaking,” Kara said, concern taking over her voice. “What’s going on?”

She wasn’t angry, she seemed to genuinely care.  

“It’s nothing, I’m fine,” she said. 

Kara tilted her head and released Lena from her embrace. She felt cold with the absence of Kara’s touch but she didn’t say anything. She didn’t want to ruin what she had here. 

“I’m worried about you, Lee.”

Lena sighed. She’d never knew how much she’d liked it when Kara called her by a nickname until now. When she went back to the real world, it would just be Lena. 

“I’m okay, I promise,” she said, reaching for Kara’s hand. “I’m… I’m kind of tired, can we go lie down for a little bit? I… I’m sorry.” 

Kara nodded, the look of worry still not leaving her face. She guided Lena to the bedroom and sat down on her bed, Lena curled up beside her, with her head on Kara’s chest. Quickly, she fell into a deep sleep. Surrounded by warmth, wrapped in Kara’s strong, loving embrace. When she opened her eyes, she felt a rush of coldness make its way down her spine. The lights on the ceiling were blinding, and she no longer felt Kara’s soft figure beneath her, but something stiff and awkward. 

“Kara?” She whispered, she tilted her head. She was in CatCo lying on what she assumed was the couch in James’ office when, she’d woken up. She saw Kara sitting at the chair across from her, she immediately stood up and came to Lena’s aid, crouching down beside her. 

“Hey, how do you feel,” she asked and smiled. 

Lena used all the strength she had inside of her to sit up, but the movement caused a throbbing sensation to erupt inside her head. She brought a hand to her forehead and looked around. She saw James sitting beside her, her head had been lying in his lap. She really was back to the real world. 

“I’m fine,” she lied. 

Kara nodded, the crinkle between her eyes was clear. This Kara did care too. 

“What happened?”

As James began to explain the events of today, she blocked his voice out. She knew what had happened. She had been ripped away from her own perfect safe space. She was back to face the hatred that surrounded her, following her wherever she went. She was back to her loveless, empty life. With Kara there only as a friend, not to fill the void inside her heart that had been aching for her ever since the day they’d met. She was back, her mind palace completely gone. 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Also some shameless self promo, I'm working on a multi chap fic called "Dear Lena Luthor" so if you'd like, please check that out too.


End file.
